How To Stop Toddler Tantrums The Most Effective Way!
Trying to stop toddler tantrums is the Worst! You are at the toys section of the department store, and on the ground is your toddler, to who you just said that he/she cannot have their way, again. You notice his/her face turning red, kicking their legs, their clenched hands pounding the floor, all with a high-pitched scream that can be heard throughout the store. With all eyes gazing at you, you can only wish you were invisible; how you wish you could stop the toddler tantrum has happened in front of everyone!
At least you are not alone; most parents of toddlers go through many similar scenarios, except for some differences in the tantrum techniques. Tantrums are highly common in toddlers! Those falling within the age range 1 and 4, where kids are still learning to communicate and express their feelings.
Yes, tantrums are normal for every kid during their toddler years, and you don’t really need to worry about them if they are occasional. It is when your toddler’s tantrums get severe and more frequent that you need to start worrying and look for ways to prevent and/or stop them.
What Are Tantrums?
Honestly, there is no one definition to tantrums. Tantrums can be seen in all different forms like frustration or anger and more. Not every toddler displays the same actions or techniques during a tantrum. For instance, if your child throws a tantrum by kicking, screaming, and crying, some other kid can exhibit the same by breaking things, holding their breath, or running away. Each kid has his/her own way of expressing their frustration.
What Causes Toddler Tantrums?
Most parents think that tantrums arise just out of the blue, but do they really? Not at all. In fact, there are specific triggers that draw them out. In some cases, even the smallest and most unexpected things can trigger tantrums. For instance, requesting your little one to share their favorite toy with a friend or sibling, or you toddler might be in the middle of assembling Lego’s when you ask them to get ready for bed can trigger a tantrum.
Kids who temperamental or hyperactive tend to get easily frustrated and are prone to tantrums. And in most kids, two important factors that easily trigger a tantrum are hunger and tiredness. Certain strong emotions such as fear, worry, etc., which can be overwhelming for kids, can lead to tantrums.
Does It Happen on Purpose?
Your toddler certainly doesn’t create a master plan to embarrass, frustrate, or make you angry. As mentioned earlier, toddlers use tantrums as a system to vent their frustration. Now, what makes things worse is if you try to stop their tantrum by giving them what they want or by letting them escape a situation just because they throw a tantrum.
How to Stop Toddler Tantrums?
You don’t have to undergo years of training to prevent or deal with toddler tantrums. You can start by implementing some ground rules, right from your home, without giving up of love. It is important for your kids to feel loved, cherished, understood. It is equally important to set limits that they never cross.
One of the best ways to prevent tantrums with your toddler is to make them feel like they have some level of control. You can implement this by giving them choices, rather than using the usual yes or no questions. For instance, when it comes to your toddler’s meal, say pasta for dinner, ask him/her if he would like to have beans or carrots with it. The same technique can be applied to a lot of other scenarios, from giving them choices to choose their outfit for the day to choosing their own birthday or Christmas gift when they behave.
The next technique would be to establish a set of rules for when you take your toddler out. For example, before you take him/her with you for grocery shopping, tell them before stepping out the house their buying limit, say one candy or one small cup of ice cream or a cookie, and that they get no more.Another scenario is, if you are planning on a date night with your partner, inform your kid beforehand that he/she will be having a wonderful time with whoever babysits them, and that you will be back right before bedtime or you will be there when they wake up.
Here Are Some Bullet Points To Follow To Stop Toddler Tantrums
- Be calm: Always remember to stay calm yourself when your toddler throws a tantrum. After all, screaming at each other will get you nowhere. When your little one has an outburst, it is important that you gain control. Avoid shouting, spanking, and other actions out of anger. Take a deep breath, gain your calm, give your kid some time to recover, lower your voice, and let him/her know gently but firmly that this behavior of theirs is not acceptable.
- Prevent tantrum triggers: As discussed, most of the times toddlers get frustrated when they are hungry and tired. Prevent these tantrum triggers by making sure your child is well-rested and fed before you head out. On the other hand, if your toddler doesn’t do well in restaurants, try to go with take-away or choose restaurants that have faster service. And if they tend to lose it at the chocolate or toys aisle of the department store, avoid those areas or dictate clear rules before visiting those places.
- Try distractions: Before your toddler’s tantrum gets to the peak, try distracting him/her by moving to a different area, talking to them about a different topic, or anything else you can think of.
Some Extra Tips To Stop Toddler Tantrums
- Talk it out: Once your toddler calms down, take the time to talk to him/her about what happened. If your kid can talk, encourage him/her to use their words to express how they feel. Remember to address their hard feelings. For example, “I know you get frustrated and tired when it takes a long time at the restaurant, but…”. This makes your toddler realize that their feelings are understood and gives them the chance to reboot.
- Give them freedom: Avoid saying “no” to things your toddler would enjoy, even if it involves creating a mess. Let them run around and have fun. Only say “no” to those matters that are of high importance.
- Give praise: Pay attention to when your toddler behaves right, especially in situations that otherwise would have led to a tantrum, and praise him/her immediately. Give them a hug and let them know how proud you are to see them control their hard emotion.
The toddler years of your child are some of the most crucial years of their life and yours. The way you approach this phase has a significant impact on their individual personality. It is during this time that they learn a lot. Therefore, make sure that you take the right approach so you can help your little one to grow up into a better human.
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